Social workers know this well.
I remind myself every morning: Nothing I say this day will teach me anything. So if I’m going to learn, I must do it by listening.-Larry King
When you interact with someone online over a span of time.
Is when listening/hearing makes a difference.
If the person didn’t listen,the conversations will lack deep.
Generic conversations makes the speaker see it like a waste of time getting to know that someone.
Skilled listeners are curious, but curious people are not always skilled listeners.
Curiosity matters, if you are a skilled listener you will try to understand what is being said.
Which is the other person point of view and why.
Being a listener is being a qualified opinion to add to a conversation and create a bond.
Listening helps others the most,way more than talking.
Keep in mind that sometimes a conversation is only on being assertive at key points.Conversations are mental health do not understimate the value of online conversations.
Conversations without context are small talk.
But in a contextual interaction what gives value to a conversation is your ability to add to it.
When the speaker finishes if you heard instead listen what will you assert or dissert to?
You have nothing!
And don’t forget someone is paying to get a conversation going on.
Having the ability to enjoy a conversation on demand and in an anonymous way with an openminded stranger is a good service worth paying for.
It’s a service your friends can’t provide.
There are different kinds of conversational contexts, the online adult one is better suited to talk about intimate feelings at any time while being anonymous but with the ability to stablish a bond with a stranger.
Just an example:
- Waking up in the middle of the night and you live alone.
Who are you going to call or talk to if you live alone?
You don’t have to be a qualified psychologist to be a good active listener and have rich conversations.
Never refuse professional help, but sometimes things don’t need a professional just a friendly talk.
It’s just common sense, do you need a software engineer to install an app in your phone?.
You call a software engineer if you need to fix or develop an app to run properly.
The act of listening is frenzied and it’s not boring.
When you are talking to a skilled listener,that listener is studying everything you say.
Listening is not being passive at all, is just being focused on what’s being told and why.
The first thing a skilled listener will do is piece together a context.
Keep in mind to listen is like a puzzle, the speaker is throwing pieces and the listener must piece them together to see the big picture.
The skilled listener job is to filter what motivates the Interlocutor.
Before empathy, comes listening.
A good listener will understand what’s being talked about,so that listener may add to the conversation subject.
I liked this article about characteristics of a good listener, it’s simple yet deep.
But an empathetic listener will understand and WHY is that being talked about, conversations involve subjects AND feelings.
Finally online adult industry can be a great place to just be listened.
Online workers are used to being social.But they are not used to listening because this Social aspect of adult industry is not yet very known.Due the fact that some don’t see the demand ,others are not aware of the offer because no one talks about it.
The deaf,the mute the blind big picture…